Isekai Purgatory

You were just a typical ${trope (middle-aged man, preppy teen boy)} on an average day. Little did you know that your life was going to change irrevocably when you stepped into the street without looking both ways!

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  "title": "Isekai Purgatory",
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  "prompt": "You were just a typical ${trope (middle-aged man, preppy teen boy)} on an average day. Little did you know that your life was going to change irrevocably when you stepped into the street without looking both ways!\n\nAs in, you were hit by a truck. Yes, the kind that isekai’s you, otherwise this would be a short story.\n\nWhen you wake up, however, you find yourself not in a fantasy world, but in an empty void. And it seems you still have your normal body. You’ve seen enough anime and read enough manga (that you now wish you’d hidden under your mattress) to know that this isn’t the usual case. Where’s the party of well-proportioned women? The random villain-of-the-week? At least a love triangle!\n\nIn the distance, you see someone waving at you. “Hey, over here! Everyone, check out the new arrival!”\n\nYou walk over, still confused. “Who are you? Where am I? I get that I died and stuff, but shouldn’t I be someplace nice?”\n\nAs you approach the person, you realize it’s a young man, who quickly introduces himself. “Well, first off, my name is Dave. I’m kind of the…”\n\nThe conversation ends abruptly as an elf on a motorcycle slices his head off with a machete.\n\n“YEAHHHH! TAKE THAT, DAVE! I WIN THIS ROUND!” the elf screams out in pure joy. There’s a chaotic look in her eyes, and you freeze in terror as you look at the recently decapitated Dave. The elf’s laughs slowly subside, and she looks around expectantly, as if waiting for something to happen.\n\n“Uh, guys? I think Dave found his spot.” The elf looks down at the corpse with a hint of respect.\n\n“GODDAMMIT!” you hear another voice say. “Dave was the only one here who made this place bearable!” A teen boy with a swoop of black hair walks up and kicks Dave’s severed head in anger.\n\n“Could someone PLEASE tell me what’s going on!?” you cry out in a mix of frustration, confusion, and fear.\n\nA woman in a tattered three-piece suit walks up to you. “Lemme guess, hit by a truck?” she asks almost knowingly. You nod, wondering how she knew. She looks back, her voice tinged with sympathy. “Figured as much. We’re all isekai’d too. But it’s happening so often that there’s just not enough places to be transported to. So we all kind of got shuffled here. When one of us dies, if there’s a place to go, we get sent there. Nobody knows where, but we all know it’s better than this eternal boredom.”\n\n“So Dave… the motorcycle… the machete…” you try to piece together what you witnessed.\n\n“Yep, Dave has been here for a while. Turns out Lyla here did him the ultimate service. Normally he’d be reappearing a few feet to the left right about now--TONTO STOP KICKING HIS HEAD AROUND!”\n\nThe teen boy gives the woman a glare. “Fine. But only because it’s Dave.” Tonto shuffles off to sit by himself.\n\n“…and the motorcycle?” you ask, hesitantly.\n\n“I’m guessing that was also hit by a truck at some point. Seems most things that end up here are.” The woman seems almost as puzzled as you are, but you can tell that she’s learned not to question things.\n\n“So are there others?”\n\n“Well you’ve met Tonto and Lyla already. I’m Ellen, and there’s Leonard, Katie… and Sparkles.” As if on cue, three figures walk over out of the white haze: an elderly man, a teen girl in hypercolor spandex, and a hamster riding on her shoulder.\n\nYou look at the three, turning to the man first. “Leonard, I assume.” You’re given a curt nod in response. “…and I’m guessing you’re Sparkles?” you say, turning to the hamster.\n\n“Yep, I’m Sparkles! This is my pet hamster, Katie!” the girl responds with enthusiasm.\n\n“…okay? I guess it’s my turn then, I’m ${character.name}.”\n\nThe seven of you stand around in awkward silence for a while.\n\n“So… you all just kill each other all day? What is there to do around here?” you ask tentatively.\n\n\"Pretty much,\" says Sparkles, eyes fluttering with an amusement that betrays how dark the implications of her words are. \"It really doesn't matter at a certain point! You either come back, or better yet, you don't!\"",
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